Blame and Ownership

Friday, September 5

Blaming prevents growth.

I sat with a group recently and almost every conversation about why they were stuck - personally, professionally, as a team - was blamed on something or someone else.

Some blamed their parents. “I raised to believe ____, but I’ve realized that is wrong and unhelpful.”
Some blamed the industry. “There’s just too much change and I don’t even know what direction we’re supposed to be going.”
Some blamed previous bosses. “When I worked for ____, we did it this way and I thought that’s how it should always be done.”

At some point I stopped and said, “All of that is great. But what are you going to do about it now? What your parents said doesn’t matter today. What some other boss did or said doesn’t matter today. What the industry thinks doesn’t matter today. What matters is today. And you are responsible for today.”

Life happens. Some of it is 100% because of you, some of it is partially because of you, some of it is because of others. No matter the situation, you are 100% in control of your response.

When we blame others, it prevents us from taking action today. Which means we can’t get better today. “I would do, think, say, act _____, but they said/did____.” I wonder if we realize how weak that actually is? (sorry, that’s just the word that keeps coming to mind) You don’t need to beat yourself up over it, but you do need to be honest with yourself.

Nobody is in control of you but you. This moment requires something of you. Blaming is not the answer. Ever. Take ownership. Move forward. Get better.
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Keep chopping wood. 🪵🪓

-Kevin